梁祝化蝶歌词电话英语之电话留言篇

2021年1月17日发(作者：鲁滨孙漂流记)
电话英语之电话留言篇

中国家庭并不常用电话答录机（Answering M achine）,但在北
美家庭，几乎家家都用。外来电话拨入时，若该电话号码的主人不在，
就会让拨入者听到一段留言，这叫Answer。绝大多数的 Answer都
是千篇一律的：说明主人 不在，请拨入者留下简短信息及姓名电话号
码等。以下几则特别的 Answer 体现了美国佬的幽默 ，你能体会出
其幽默所在吗？同时，本人希望读者能举一反三，从美国家庭电话留
言中学到一些 有用的东西，从而可以应用到商务电话留言当中来：
1) My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if
you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as
soon as we're finished.
2) Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already
sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If
you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough
money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a
female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
3) Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is,
so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep（beep：主人的
Answer讲完以后，Answer Machine会发出一声beep, 这时候来电
话者就可以开始留言了。）.
4) Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his
refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your
message to myself with one of these magnets（磁铁）.
注：通常情况下，来电话者面对录音讲话都不太自然 ，所以语言
往往很急促，三句两句话就完了。这可苦坏了接听留言的主人，听多
少遍都听不清留 言者到底是谁，讲了些什么。对于母语非英文的人，
这种感觉会更深。所以，以下这两段幽默干脆就首先 告诉电话拨入者，
我的Answer Machine不好使，你且慢慢来。
5) Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine
just eloped（私奔） with her tape deck（磁带驱动器）, so I'm stuck
with taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while
you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
6） Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of
receiving messages. My owners do not need siding（墙板，壁板）,
windows, or a hot tub（浴盆）, and their carpets are clean. They
give to charity（慈善团体） through their office and do not need
their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and
number and they will get back to you.
7） Hi. I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone I
don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
8） This is not an answering machine -- this is a telepathic
（心灵感应术） thought- recording device. After the tone, think
about your name, your reason for calling and a number where I
can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.
注：tone：与对第3）句beep 的注释含义完全一样，主人的
Answer讲完以后，Answer Machine会发出一声beep, 这时候来电
话者就可以开始留言了。
9) Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone
right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I
call you back.
6) Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of
receiving messages. My owners do not need siding（墙板，壁板）,
windows, or a hot tub（浴盆）, and their carpets are clean. They
give to charity（慈善团体） through their office and do not need
their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and
number and they will get back to you.
10) If you are a burglar(夜贼), then we're probably at home
cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone.
Otherwise, we probably aren't home and it's safe to leave us a
message.
11) You're growing tired. Your eyelids(眼皮) are getting
heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your
willpower(毅力) and your ability to resist suggestions. When
you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to(感到无助