牛肉辣椒酱的做法大全-陈情表读后感
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小学英语六年级上册各单元作文范例及点评
Li Ying ’S Hobby
Li
Ying
likes
English
very
much.
She
works
hard
at it. She reads English every morning.
She likes
speaking English. She often
listens to the radio. She
watches TV
only on Saturday evening.
Does
she
like
dan
cing?
No,
she
doesn’t.
But
she
likes drawing and singing. Her parents
love her. And
all
the
teachers
and
her
friends
like
her,
too.
She
says
her hobbies make
her happy.
【要领点评】
这一篇写爱好的文章
,
小作者 的写作思路很值得我们学习
,
他没有具体写到刘莹的某
一
种爱好
,
而是从学习到课余的多种爱好入手
,
对刘 莹的各种爱好进行了粗线条地勾画
.
从
“爱好”这个角度
来看刘莹的话,我们会觉得这个形象很饱满。
小朋友们写这种“叙事写人”作文时,可以从两个角度下手: 一是具体地描绘;二
是和上面小朋友一样,粗线条地勾画,二者各有所长,另处在行文中
使用一些问句,使用一
些转述的话,可以使作文更有灵气,避免了平铺直叙的缺点。比如
上文的“Does she like
dancing? No, she
doesn’t.”和“she says her hobbies make her
happy.”就是十分不
错的句子,使读者眼前为之一亮。
Don’t be
against
(违反)
the traffic rules
I go to school from Monday to Friday .I go to
school
by
bike
at
7:30
in
the
morning
.I
must
cross
two
busy
roads
.If
the
traffic
light
is
red
or
yellow,I
know
I can’t cross the road ,so I
wait.
If
the
light
turns
green
,
I
know
it
means
“Go”,
and
then I walk across the road .I always ride on the
right side
of
the
road
.I
am
never
against
the traffic
rules.
【要领点评】
这篇作文的题目是“不要违反交通规则”,小作者没有说一些 空话,而是从自己的
经历写起,叙述自己以什么方式去上学,在上学的路上是怎么做的,
很形象。
p>
小朋友们在作文时注意不要图大,那样很容易使文章显得空洞,而要写自己身边熟
悉的事情。要注意行文中字母的大小写、句子的标点符号等。
I Love My Family
Here is a photo lf my family. These are four
people
in my family. They
are
my
father,
my
mother,
my
brother and I.
My father is a doctor. He works in a hospital
far away. He goes to work by
subway. My mother is a
teacher. She
works in a school near my home. She goes
to work by bike. After work, they like
reading books.
Who
is
the
tall
boy?
He
is
my
brother.
He
is
five
years
older than me.
He is a singer. He’s now in Beijing.
He
goes there by plane.
I love my family.
【要领点评】
一个平凡的题材 ,一篇生动的作文。这样的命题,我们可能面对几次,甚至几十次
了。但这位小朋友的笔
端很是灵巧,
了了数言,让一个幸福的家庭跃然纸上,很值得我们去
思考
,我们能做到吗?
小朋友的这篇作文除了语言优美之外,在结构上也有闪光之处。先总说,将自己 的
家人逐个介绍一遍,后分说,把家人的工作、上班方式,爱好一一细说。最后以一句话
进行
概括,起到点题的作用。我们在写类似的作文的时候是不是也可以借鉴呢?
How to get to
the science museum
We are going to the science museum tomorrow.
There is an old thing show in
the Museum. Do you know
how we can get
to the science museum?
The
science
museum
is
next
to
the
People’s
Park.
It’s isn’t
far from our school. So we can go th
ere
on
foot
.Walk
straight
to
the
west
from
our
school,
next
turn
left
at
the
post
office
and
walk
for
about
5
minutes,
then turn right at traffic lights. You
can find the
People’s
Park
on
the
right
.
Walk
straight,
and
you’ll
see the science museum.
【要领点评】
这篇作文的题目是“怎样去科学 博物馆”。怎样才算是一篇好作文呢?通过你的叙
述,
能让别人很容易找 到博物馆,
这应是最基本的要求。
小作者在文中告诉我们什么呢?首
先他写了去博物馆的位置,
最后浓墨重彩,
指明从学校去博物馆的具体 路线,
这条路线够清
晰吧!
小朋友们在写这类作文的时候,总有些无从 下手的感觉,不知从何说起。其实介绍
路线,
无非就是告诉他人某段路的 起点和终点,
还有就是如何从起点走到终点。
要给他人说
清楚,
你自己首先得清楚,然后再通过自己的叙述,将路线清清楚楚得呈现出来。
一定要注
意行文中一些关键的地方,
如在哪儿转弯,
向哪 儿转,
经过哪些重要的交通标志或显眼的标
志建筑等。这样,你就能说清
,别人也能弄明白。