-
2013
高考上海卷英语作文点评
II. Guided Writing
Directions:
Write
an
English
composition
in
120-150
words
according
to
the
instructions given
in Chinese.
上海博物馆拟举办一次名画展，
现就展出场所
（博物馆还是社区图书馆）
征
集公众意见，
假设你是王敏，
给上海博物馆写一封信表达你的想法。
你的信必须
满足以下要求：
1.
简述你写信的目的及你对场所的选择；
2.
说明你的理由（从便利性，专业性等方面对这两个场所进行对比）
Dear Sir/ Madam,
I’
ve just learned that Shanghai Museum is to hold a famous painting exhibition
and you’re collecting
public suggestions about which location to hold it
. I’m writing
this
letter
to
share
with
you
my
opinions.
As
far
as
I
’
m
concerned,
it
is
more
reasonable
to
hold
the
painting
exhibition
in
Shanghai
Museum
than
in
community
libraries. My reasons are as follows.
On the one hand, it is more convenient
for people to
reach Shanghai Museum,
located in the center of the city.
Visitors can go there by subway and bus and so on.
What
’
s
more, Shanghai
Museum is
much more
extensive
than community libraries,
providing
visitors
with
a
more
comfortable
environment
to
appreciate
the
famous
paintings.
On the other hand, Shanghai Museum, a well- known and distinguished museum
at home
and abroad, is more professional in holding
painting exhibitions. What
’
s of
great
significance
is
that
not
only
does
it
provide
advanced
facilities
and
high-tech
monitors but also offers professional
security guards to protect those famous paintings
from being damaged or stolen in the
process of exhibition.
Consequently, I strongly propose that the painting exhibition is to be held in the
Shanghai Museum.
Yours,
Wang Min
赏析：
今年上海市 的高考英语作文话题贴近学生的生活实际，
用书信的载体呈现，
让
考生对画展感觉到有话可以说，但是想要达到
A
类作文，不仅需要有扎实 语言
功底，
还需要对博物馆和社区图书馆及画展等生活类的语言应用娴熟 ，
更需要学
生从专业一点的角度，
深入分析其选择的理由 ，
这个层面很多学生很难用专业的
语言区描述，
学生平时 学习时间紧张，
没有时间到社会上参加一些社会活动，
而
且在紧张的时间里，
更别提用一些复杂的语言结构区展示自己的理由，
所以学生< /p>
写到高分不是很容易，大部分学生得到
15/16
分是没有 问题的。采取这样的命题
思路对英语教学有较好的反馈作用，
学校和家庭 不仅仅督促学生的学习更要提供
机会让孩子走出课堂，走向社会，培养学生创造性和批判
性思维。
提示：
生活类词汇
:
museum
library
painting
exhibition
advanced
facility
high-
tech
monitor security guard
分词的应用：
located
providing
distinguished
句型：主语从句
标语从句
倒装等
2012
年上海高考英语作文
Directions: Write an English
composition in 120
- 150 words according to the instructions
given
below
in Chinese.
上周一，
你在一所小学观摩了小女孩
Amy
所在班级的两堂绘画课
（如图所示）
，
回家后你用
英语写了一篇日记，内容包括：
●
对两堂绘画课的具体描述；
●
你从中获得的启发。
2012 Shanghai English Test
writing sample 3
( for
reference only )
Today I had an unusual experience , which refreshed my mind. With pupils I spent two periods
of
time
in
a
primary
school,
watching
them
learn
how
to
paint.
A
little
girl
named
Amy,
one
student of the class, left
me a deep impression with her unique painting.
In the first lesson the teacher required the pupils to paint freely. Namely
, in any way they
could draw whatever they’d
like to. Amy was the first one to have a
try. I saw her think for a little
while, take off her shoes, then dip her
feet slightly into the paint/ink. Much to my
surprise, in a
flash she managed to
make a nice design on a broad piece of white
paper/blanket with both of her
feet.
What happened next, various of types of works
painted by other children appearing before
my eyes one by one ,kept me laughing
with joy and amusement.
Following a break, the second class began. smiling ,the teacher made a brief comment, which
was full of praise
as well as appreciation. After that ,she gave the
students some guidance about
the
traditional
way
of
painting.
With
her
teachers’
words
in
mind
,
Amy
practiced
again.
Painting-brush
in
hand
,she
sat
a
desk
properly/straight
,paying
full
attention
to
her
work.
This
time
，
with ease and excitement she drew some birds flying high in the sky /sun.
Looking back at the two ways of giving a class, I have to admit the teacher was well worth
following in matters of
cultivating “flowers” in the spirit of
originality.
Given that children are of
great imagination and elasticity in
their growth , they are supposed to be given as
many chances
and opportunities as
possible in the course of being educated so as to
develop their potential to the
full.
Were
the
young
always
confined
to
the
established
ways
of
doing
things
without
a
free
world ,one that is also
longed for by the ambitious
birds drawn by Amy , how can we expect
the next generation our civilized
nation
would
be more innovative and
creative ?
2012 Shanghai English Test writing
sample 4
( for reference
only )
Today I had an unusual experience , which refreshed my mind. With pupils I spent two periods
of
time
in
a
primary
school,
watching
them
learn
how
to
paint.
A
little
girl
named
Amy,
one
student of the class, left me a deep
impression with her unique painting.
In the first lesson the teacher required the pupils to paint freely. Namely
, in any way they
could draw whatever they’d like to. Amy
was the first one to have a try. I saw her
think for a little
while, take
off her shoes, then dip her feet slightly into the
paint/ink. Much to my surprise, in a
flash she managed to make a nice design
on a broad piece of white paper/blanket with both
of her
feet. What happened next,
various of types of works painted by other
children appearing before
my eyes one
by one ,kept me laughing with joy and amusement.
Following a break, the second class began. With a smile ,the teacher made a brief comment,
which was
full of praise as well as appreciation. After that
,she gave the students some guidance
about
the
traditional
way
of
painting.
With
her
teachers’
words
in
mind
, Amy
practiced
again.
Painting-brush
in
hand
,she
sat
a
desk
properly/straight
,paying
full
attention
to
her
work.
This
time
，
with ease and excitement she drew some birds flying high in the sky /sun.
Simple
and
amusing
as
it
seemed,
the
two
ways
of
painting
are
thought-provoking.
As
is
generally
accepted
,students
,especially,
children
have
great
potential
in
their
growth
and
development.
As
a
matter
of
fact,
whether
their
talents
can
be
developed
to
the
full,
to
a
great
degree,
depends
on
how
children
are
educated.
While
some
valuable
traditions
are
well
worth
cherishing,
thinking
in
an
original
way
should
be
encouraged
and
emphasized
among
children
when it
comes to teaching or education, who are supposed
to be characterized by “innovation and
creation ”. Only in this way, can they
keep in pace with the fast
-developing modern world.
2011
年上 海卷高考英语作文范话题：向一个基金会申请
2000
元做个项目来支持贫困学生 ，需要包含以下
的一些要点
1.
介绍自己
2.
项目具体实施方案
3.2000
元如何利用
Dear foundation organizers,
My name is Jerry Lu, a student currently studying at Shanghai XX High school. I am writing,
on
behalf
of
my
classmates,
to
apply
for
the
2000
yuan
worth
of
fund
in
a
bid
to
initiate
a
program
aimed at helping those students who are
financially disadvantaged.
Being raised in families that don’t have to worry about putting food on the table need not
mean oblivion to our less fortunate
peers. On this account, we would appreciate it if
you could
sponsor our poverty-relief
endeavor. The following is how we would go about
using the money. We
would
spend
1500
yuan
purchasing
some
stationery
for
the
needy
students
at
our
school.
It
is
worth
noting
that
we
would
inform
them
to
pick
up
the
school
supplies
themselves
instead
of
us
“doling
out” the supplies so that we wouldn’t
embarrass those who we want to help. The remainder
of
the
fund
would
be
used
to
invite
a
motivational
speaker
who
was
to
talk
about
how
to
lift
oneself
out of poverty by making
right academic and professional decisions.
Modest as our efforts may sound, we believe they will warm some hearts. Much obliged if you
could reply at your
earliest convenience.
Yours Sincerely,
Jerry Lu
2010
年上海高考作文及范例
下图是小学新生的课堂一脚，
对照你当时的上课情况，
作出比较并谈谈你的感受。
你的作文
必须包括：
●描述图片里学生上课的场景
●比较你同时期的上课情况
●简单谈谈你的感受
As is described in the picture, a group
of foreign
students
are raising their hands to give
answers to
the question in a joyful and active way. The
purpose of the picture is to show us how
active the class performance is in the
foreign country.
Western students are
more likely to be open-minded and willing to
express their unique ideas
in class.
Just as the picture shows: When the teacher is
asking a question, every child raises their
hands and is eager to answer the
question. They do not fear giving the in-class
performance while
others are watching.
This
scene
reminds
me
of
my
own
class
situation
when
I
was
at
elementary
school.
As
Chinese
children
are
more
often
than
not
very
conservative
and
modest,
therefore,
my
teachers
usually
called a student's name if nobody dared to answer
the questions. Then the appointed child
behaved awkwardly and was reluctant to
say just a few words.
This
recollection
makes
me
feel
rather
disappointed.
In
fact,
we
should
at
least
give
a
try,
whether
the
answer
is
perfect
or
not.
It's
a
chance
of
learning,
more
specifically,
if
we
are
well-done, we will gain
confidence; if not, we will get informed of a
better solution, which will
provide us
experience in the later situation. All in all,
it's more sensible to be active in class.
图画式议论文
1.
特点：
是通过观察和分析单幅或一组画，把图画内容转化成文
字信息。
2.
注意点：
(1).
要认真审图
(2).
需从整体上把握图画所呈现的主要内容，处理好人物与时空的
关系及局部与整体的关系，找出文章的线索或主题。
(3).
“
丰满的想象
+
变化的表达
”
3.
结构：
第一段
描述图画，一般不超过三分之一篇幅
第二段
揭示画旨
（一般一言即可）
第三段
发表感想、评论或提出建议（占主要篇幅）
第四段
简单谈谈自己的感受
注意：二三两段可合成一段
2009
年上海高考作文及范例
某海外学校举办英语夏令营，开设了如下课程：园艺（
gardening
）< /p>
，烹饪（
cooking
）
,
防身术（
self- defence
）
，护理（
nursing
）
。假如你是王跃华（不可以用自己的真实姓名）
，写
一封申请信，报名参加其中一门课程的学习。信的内容必须包括：
1
、你感兴趣的课程
2
、你期望从这门课程中学到什么
3
、为什么想学这些内容
It is said that a summer camp is to be
held by your school and a few courses are
available to
choose from. I am
interested in gardening, in that I believe it
features my character and personal
benefits.
During the
learning period, I expect to gain some unexpected
knowledge. A radical technique
I
’
d like to obtain is to know how to tell different species of plants and flowers apart. This helps me
to have a
clear outlook of those in my garden. Furthermore,
the proper cutting time and frequency
to water are some other skills I want
to learn. A little knowledge concerning choosing
suitable soil
or the reasonable
planting positions will also be a good choice.
The mani reason why I choose gardening
is that I want to help my parents with their work
in
the domestic garden. In addition, I
find that we students generally lack the knolwdge
of gardening,
missing a chance to have
a word with nature, so that knowing the
surroundings is imperitave. Last
but
not least, by attending the course, I will have a
meaningful summer vacation, and drowning
myself bewteen plants will by all means
add a brilliant touch to my life.
2008
年上海高考作文及范例
你班将组队参加学校组织的集体舞比赛（
group
dancing
cooipetition)
，班长希望大家积
极参加。对此谈谈你的看法。
你的文章必须包括以下内容：
·
你是否会参加比赛
·
你做出该决定的具体理由
Version 1:
A group dancing
competition will be held in our school and the
monitor calls on everybody to
take an
active part in it. While most of my classmates are
still hesitating whether to participate, I
have said yes to our monitor with great
pleasure.
Generally speaking, there are
two reasons for my decision. First, it is a good
opportunity for
me to relax myself,
which will enable me to study more efficiently.
All work and no play makes
Jack a dull
boy, so goes the saying, which clearly shows us
the importance of relaxation. Besides,
I
think
I
am
a
good
dancer
after
learning
dance
for
more
than
five
years.
Participating
in
the
contest will be a golden chance for me
to show my dancing skills and make some
contributions to
the class.
For the two reasons mentioned above, it
is no surprise that I have such a strong
enthusiasm
on the group dancing
competition.
Version 2:
Today the monitor calls on everybody to
take an active part in the group dancing
competition
which will be held in a
couple of days in our school. But after some
careful consideration, I have
decided
not to participate.
There are a number
of reasons for my decision. First and foremost, as
the College Entrance
Exam is just
around the corner, study is the top priority for
me. Participating in the group dancing
competition has to give way because it
might take me too much time. What’s more, without
any
experience of dancing, I
do
n’t think I can be a good dancing partner. I am afraid my poor dancing
skills will probably spoil the
performance of the whole class. In this case, it’s
better for me to be a
spectator
cheering for my classmates.
For
these reasons, it seems more appropriate for me to
watch the competition
than to dance
myself.
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