-
（
3
）
Follow Positive Fashions, Resist
Negative Fashions.
韩蕊蕊
临淄雪宫中学
Fashions refer
to the things that most people tend to do. Some
fashions are positive and meaningful
while some are negative and harmful. So
we can’t simply say we should follow fashions
or
we shouldn’t follow
fashions. It’s the effect fashions have
on society that counts.
When it
comes to clothes, fashions should not be followed.
What others wear may not fit you. Also, you
don’t need to change your likes and
dislikes in order to follow fashions. It’s stupid
to run after fashions without
consideration. What clothes we should
buy depends on our financial ability, our tastes,
our identity and so on. If
everyone
follows fashions without thinking, people will
lose their own personality and our society will
lack the
motivation to develop. In a
nutshell, we shouldn’t follow wearing fashions.
It’s important that we dress what we
like and feel comfortable in it.
Fashions also include donating money
and items. It’s the fashion that we should follow.
We
nchuan and
Yushu earthquake
destroy many people’s homes. As Chinese, we have
the res
-ponsbility[*1] to give a hand to
them. To help them rebuild their houses
and pick up their courage, we should do what we
can. At one time,
many people give out
a large number of money and items without
hesitation. We are glad to see that the
fashion has been formed. On no
condition should we give up helping others. That
fashion represents Chinese
spirits.
Everyone following the fashion, [12] we will over
come[*3] any difficulties and head to the bright
future.
Should we follow fashions? At
some time, we should; at some time, we shouldn’t .
If the fashion has a
positive effect on
our society, it should be encouraged. If the
fashion does harm to our society, it must be
resiste
d. It’s the principle we should insist on. Only in this way can our country develop rapidly. Treat fashions
correctly, and everyone will live a
better life.
专家点评：
从文
章的字里行间能明显感觉到该同学对于英语语言本身的休养较高：包括词的选择使用，难句的把握，
整体的流畅性，都是值得赞扬和学习的，这是一篇很优秀的文章。
< br>----------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------
[*1]responsibility
[12]
句子缺东西，再者与后句缺乏逻辑关系。
[*3]overcome
（
2
）
Follow Fashions without Losing Yourself
赖绮玫
广州市执信中学
When it comes to fashion, what will you
come up with? Gucci, Prada, Channel or Nike, Puma,
Addidas?
If these are all the things
you can think of, I have to say your definition of
fashion is too shallow[11] . As far as I
am concerned, following fashions is not
just about chasing labels, it pertains with
choosing a lifestyle, adjusting
your
values as well, which can be of great help to us
as long as we don’t lose our own style when
pursuing it.
The advantage [*2]
of following fashions can easily be seen from how
the fashions come about. Let’s
take[*3]
the popularity of Japanese clothes adored by such
enormous number of people is[*4] that the dresses
and shirts are beautifully decorated
with bows ,laces, making young girls unable to
resist the temptation to buy
them. As
we can conclude from the example, it is because
something is charmfu[*5] l enough to attract
people
that it turns into fashion,
which makes it totally reasonable for people to
follow fashions as they can benefit from
it.
Besides, it is an
obvious truth that humans are social animals. Such
[*6] is human nature that we like to
get together and communicate with each
iother[*7] , and invariably, fashions become a hot
topic. Therefore,
following fashions
creates common points[*8] among people, leading to
more communication and harmonious
relationship. If you keep up with
fashions, I guess, you will never be isolated and
left silent [*9] in a party.
Last but
not least, fashions actually contain varieties of
new ideas of life. They can be a new healthy
lifestyle, the latest inventions to
improve life quality or some nobel [*10] thoughts
of a better city, all of which
may be
creative indeed. [111] Only when you follow the
fashions and absorb these new ideas, can you keep
pace with times and enjoy your life
better.
Nevertheless, to follow
fashions never amounts[*12] to lose yourself in
the tide of fashions. It will be
absolutely stupid if you have no
feature of your own and just follow the steps of
others. In my opinion, keeping
your own
style is something foundamental [113] and
essential in following fashions.
To sum
up from the facts mentioned above, we can safely
reach the conclusion that as long as you stick
to your own style, following fashions
is bound to present you with a more enjoyable
life. So let’s catch up with
fashions!
专家点评：
文章思路清晰，结构紧凑，开头和
结尾紧扣主题，精干又有力，容易使读者对文章主旨的把握。中间部分
的逻辑性强，思路
也很清晰，唯一不足的是在一些长难句的表达上出现了一些错误，有些句子让人很难理解。在
以后的写作中可以多关注长句子的练习。
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[11]
不符合英语习惯，改为
narrow
是否好一些？
[*2]advantages
[*3]
删去
[*4]lies